hannah_chapter1: (Calm)
hannah_chapter1 ([personal profile] hannah_chapter1) wrote2013-01-03 04:41 pm
Entry tags:

Yes Sir Part Nine

Title: Yes Sir Part Nine
Author: hannah_chapter
Pairing: Belldom
Rating: PG-13
Summary: AU. Victorian England. Matthew is the son of a lord, Dominic is a young and innocent servant: "The moment Matthew laid eyes on the boy, he knew he had to have him."
Feedback: Makes me do the dance of joy.
Disclaimer: Fake as fake could be.


"Mr.Bellamy."

The young lady standing outside the dress shop smiles and holds out a gloved hand. Matthew removes his hat, takes the offered hand and kisses it.

"Miss Carlisle. I trust you are well."

Dominic maintains a respectful distance and waits for his master to finish his conversation. Milly, laden with parcels, joins her mistress and Dominic cannot believe his eyes. This pale, beaten-down creature bears little resemblance to the brassy, impudent girl he once knew. The reason for this change quickly becomes apparent when her mistress turns on her and subjects her to a vicious, very public and, so far as Dominic can tell, undeserved tongue-lashing. It only ends when Matthew, taking pity on the girl, steps between maid and mistress, offers Miss Carlisle his arm and invites her to take tea with him. The young lady accepts and they summon a hansom cab and depart, leaving their servants to their own devices.

Dominic watches the cab trundle down the street, then turns to Milly - or to be more precise, the spot once occupied by Milly, for the girl in question has vanished. He finds her in an alley off the main thoroughfare, sitting on a barrel, her parcels at her feet. She looks up at him, then away.

"Oh, it is you," she says, "come to gloat, have you? Go on, get it over with."

"I did not come to gloat. I thought you might need help with your parcels."

"I do not. I want nothing from you."

"I am sorry, Milly. I never wanted this."

"No? You could have dealt with me yourself, as a man should. But no, not you. You hid behind your master and let him bring me low."

"I did what I had to do, I did not have a choice. But you did, Milly. You could have kept my secret, you could have let me be. I gave you no cause to try and hurt me."

"You handled me most roughly, you threw me to the floor."

"I am sorry for that, but I did not act without due provocation. I was defending my master. Your behaviour was most inappropriate."

She laughs.

"Inappropriate? Who are you to lecture anyone about propriety?"

"Who are you? Insulting your former master, airing your grievances to all and sundry ..."

"Hark at you, so high and mighty. Your master makes you feel special, like the most important person in the world. You love him for it and you look down on me. But I have been where you are now and I know it will not last. When your master tires of you, and he will, Dominic, that much I can promise you, what will you do? What will you do when he casts you off for a younger, prettier boy? Will you smile and forgive him? Or will you strike at him any way you can, as I did?"

Dominic thinks about it.

"It would break my heart. But I would stay silent. I would keep his secrets. I owe him that much."

"Would you? We shall see."

************************

Dominic sits at the table, shirtsleeves rolled up. He dips the pen in the ink and copies the sentence, working slowly, each carefully formed letter a struggle. When he is done he puts the pen aside, flexes his fingers and waits for his master's verdict.

"Very good, Dominic."

The servant looks at the paper, doubtful.

"Really?"

"Yes. You might not think so, but you are improving. I do not think your penmanship will ever be beautiful, but it will serve."

"It is difficult."

"Of course it is. You have come to reading and writing at such a late age and I am sure my teaching methods leave a great deal to be desired."

"You are a good teacher, Matthew."

"A good teacher would never tolerate a left-handed student. He would beat you until you used the right."

"Why?"

"The left hand is sinful, it belongs to the Devil, or so I have been told."

"Do you believe that?"

"Certainly not, it is superstitious nonsense. If you want to use your left hand, then use it. Now, finish the page."

Dominic picks up the pen and Matthew watches him work.

"Did you enjoy your talk with Milly?"

"No, I did not. Did you enjoy your tea with her mistress?"

"It was exhausting. The delightful Miss Carlisle could talk for an eternity, without stopping even once for breath or refreshment. The man she marries will need some strong earplugs."

"Perhaps she will remain unmarried."

"That is possible, but unlikely. Her dowry is large, large enough to blind any potential suitor to her faults."

"You are not a potential suitor?"

"Good lord, no. I would sooner stick red-hot knives in my eyes than join myself to that young lady."

Dominic tries not to let the relief he feels show on his face. He bends to the paper and begins to write again.

*********************************

The servant yawns as he leaves his master's room. It is late and everyone else in the house has long since retired for the night - or so Dominic thinks. He enters the kitchen and sees he was mistaken. His aunt Ellen is awake and sitting at the table, a lamp by her hand.

"Ellen? Why are you still up?"

"I could not sleep," she gestures at the chair opposite her, "sit and talk with me."

Dominic sits, eyeing her warily. His mother's half-sister by their father's second wife, Ellen is, in truth, just seven years older than Dominic. Young and full of fun, more like an older sister than an aunt. But now, sitting in this dark kitchen, she is quiet, her expression grave.

"We never talk anymore, Dominic," she finally says, "I never see you."

Dominic shrugs, uncomfortable and guilty.

"Things have changed."

"They have. You have gone up in the world, the young lord's servant. A lucky boy."

Dominic is silent.

"A very lucky boy, oh yes. Do you like your master, Dominic?"

"I do."

"Do you like your work?"

"Yes."

"And when your master lays you on your back and uses you as a man uses a woman, do you like that?"

Her words act like a bucket of cold water to the face; shocking him, freezing him right down to the core, rendering him speechless.

"Where did you come by such a ridiculous idea?" he manages at last, "I do not share my master's bed. I am his servant, nothing more than that."

His denial sounds hollow even to his ears.

"Do not lie to me, it hurts when you lie to me."

"I am not lying."

"You are, you are lying and we both know it. I change your master's bedclothes and I am not blind. Blond hair all over his pillows and certain ... stains ... upon his sheets tell me all I need to know. Your master share his bed with a fair-haired boy. He shares it with you."

Further denials would be a waste of time, he does not even try.

"How long have you known?"

"I have always known."

"You did not ... tell my mother?"

"No. I have kept your secret."

"Why?"

"I thought, I hoped, you would find the courage to put an end to it, that you would come to us and tell us about your master and what he forces you to do. But you did not and I can bear it no longer."

"He does not force me. I ... like it."

"You cannot like it. It is not possible."

"But I do. He is good to me."

"Good?"

Ellen is up and around the table before he can stop her. She yanks up his coat and shirt, exposing his injured back. His bruises, fading now, are still visible and Ellen exclaims in horror.

"It is as I feared. He dresses you in pretty clothes and pets you when you please him and he beats you when you do not. This cannot go on. I will put a stop to it."

Dominic turns in his seat and pushes her away.

"You will do nothing. Interfere and I will never speak to you again."

"You cannot mean that!"

"I can and I do," he stands and adjust his clothing, "I know you mean well, but my master is not the monster you believe him to be."

"Your bruises - "

"Are not of his making. He has never raised a hand to me in anger."

She is not appeased.

"That does not make him any less of a scoundrel. He may not beat you, but he has corrupted you. He took a boy too young and ignorant to know better and taught him to revel in vile, unnatural acts."

"No, it was not like that. He did not corrupt me. He showed me the path I was always destined to walk."

"I do not believe that."

Of course she does not and he cannot make her understand. He could tell her about girls - Milly was not the first to approach him, although she was the boldest - and about how their advances have always confused and repelled him and how welcome his master's kisses had been. Oh, there had been fear - and that had so much more to do with Matthew's social position than his gender - and some pain, but there was pleasure, too, more than Dominic had ever known, and none of the disgust society tells him he should associate with such an encounter. He could tell her these things, but why even bother?

"I know you do not believe it, but it is the truth. Now, what will you do? Will you keep my secret?"

"I will, but secrets can be hard to keep. You may still be found out. What will you do then? What will you do when your master flees and abandons you to your fate?"

"He would take me with him. He said he would take me with him. He promised."

"Oh, I am sure he did, but anyone can make a promise. How can you trust him to keep his word?"

"He said I would be servant and now I am. He said he would teach me to read and write and he has. He does not make empty promises."

"Well then, let us say he is true to his word and he takes you with him. What will happen to us? Me and your mother and your father? What will we do when the Bellamys dismiss us and throw us out of this house? Who will take us in? Who would want to be associated with us in the wake of such a scandal?"

"I ..."

Dominic does not know what to say and Ellen continues.

"Of course, it may not come to that. Your secret may stay just that, a secret. But how do you think all of this will end? Your master is set to inherit his father's title, and sooner rather than later, if what I have heard about the old lord's health is true, and he cannot remain a bachelor forever. He must get himself a wife. A lord must have a lady, to breed little lords of his own. Where is your place in all of that? Even if your master does have feelings for you, he can never admit to them. Can you accept that? Are you content to be nothing more than his secret shame?"

"I will be ... whatever my master wants me to be. I will be his. I will always be his."

****************************

"You are quiet today, Dominic. Is something troubling you?"

Dominic looks up and into his master's eyes.

Tell me you love me.

Tell me we will never be parted
.

The words Dominic cannot bring himself to say.

"No, no trouble. I am fine."

"You are sure?"

Dominic smiles and squeezes Matthew's hand.

"I am. All is well."

All is well?

Oh, if only that were true.



[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-04 02:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Uhh, interesting blog and all, but did you mean to give this link to someone else?

[identity profile] ashamedbliss.livejournal.com 2013-01-05 12:23 am (UTC)(link)
Oh god i thought that mightve happened but my stupid phone didn't tell me! I had had a lovely comment typed out and for some reason I copied and pasted the comment to put in this box, ended up not doing that and then it posted the last thing on my clipboard on my phone... Which was that. GAH. Basically I wanted to say that this is always such a pleasure to read simply because of the beautiful prose, especially the line about laying him on his back, unf

Sorry my praise didn't get to you sooner but I'm not used to being computerless and this phone doesn't like my lj inbox!! Ugh

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-09 02:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh ok, I thought it was something like that. The joys of modern technology. Thank, happy to see you enjoying it.

[identity profile] engel-sehnsucht.livejournal.com 2013-01-12 12:01 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks for the accidental link, Emily - this is the course I've applied for. :D

[identity profile] ashamedbliss.livejournal.com 2013-01-12 12:15 pm (UTC)(link)
you could go to germany for a year abroad! :D are you visiting birmingham again any time soon? i'd meet you and we could go shopping! :D

[identity profile] unomusette.livejournal.com 2013-01-03 09:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooo, how lovely to see a new chapter! But boo for the nasty people trying to undermine Dominic's happiness. Nothing can be perfect though, and it's very realistic to imagine how his family might suffer should his secret come out. Bravo!

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-09 02:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks, yeah, I really wasn't thinking about all the implications of such an affair when I wrote the first part, but the more I write, the more I think about stuff like that.
ext_1380661: (Default)

[identity profile] easilyerased.livejournal.com 2013-01-04 02:59 am (UTC)(link)
Oh I hope everything turns out alright for those two. And people need to just butt out, sheesh.

<33

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-09 01:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you, well, it won't be a completely happy ending, but it won't be terribly unhappy either.

[identity profile] applehead9.livejournal.com 2013-01-04 04:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh God, bloody Ellen!
Loved this chapter as usual. <33

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-09 01:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks! Aww, every hates poor old Ellen, and she only wants what's best for him.

[identity profile] popocatekettle.livejournal.com 2013-01-05 10:17 pm (UTC)(link)
oh my god, this is ace! I just..I just love this fic so much...and it's getting so intense!xx

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-09 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you, so good to hear that!
(deleted comment)

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-09 01:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee, well I suppose Matthew, being an aristocrat, would be into bird-shooting and fox hunting and all that. Glad you like it, thanks!

[identity profile] knightsofcydo.livejournal.com 2013-01-11 02:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Omg this is so good, read the whole fix in one go last night and I couldn't think of anything else today. Are you gonna write more? Cause I really need more of this ;)

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-11 03:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks, glad you like. Yes, there'll be more of this, quite a bit more, actually.

[identity profile] engel-sehnsucht.livejournal.com 2013-01-12 12:03 am (UTC)(link)
This is actually amazing. So glad to see more of it!

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-01-14 12:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks!

[identity profile] dominicjames.livejournal.com 2013-02-16 05:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Awesome =)
I'm an idiot.. I found this, read everything and lost it =( hehe... forgot the name hehe... Oops! But now I've got it again, so I left a comment!

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-02-21 01:35 pm (UTC)(link)
I hate it when that happens - you find something, then you forget what/where it was. Thanks for commenting, good to hear you like it.

[identity profile] dominicjames.livejournal.com 2013-02-21 02:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah! I won't happen again, because I've added you! haha... I'm just someone who's busy with everything but the right things haha... so... for example: 'let's make homework' three days later I've got a lot of stupid detention hehe. but well I hope it's going to be fine with them! I am soooooooo curious O_O haha

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-02-21 09:01 pm (UTC)(link)
You'll have to wait and see...

[identity profile] pwopahnetazeta.livejournal.com 2013-10-12 10:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Please please please PLEASE TELL ME THERE IS MORE TO THIS STORY!!!!!!!!! IT IS FUCKING INCREDIBLE!!!!!!
I JUST...WOW!!!!!!!!!
just so youll kbow...i read it all in one go....from start to finish and you cant YOU CANT LEAVE ME HANGING LIKE THIS !!!!!!!!!!
TELL ME THEY WILL BE HAPPY TOGETHER!!!!! TELL ME ALL WILL BE WELL!!! TELL ME SOMETHING! ANYTHING! I JUST NEED MORE!!!
PHENOMENAL FIC!
thank you.

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-10-17 03:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks so much, so glad you liked the story. I'll be posting a new chapter in the next couple of days

[identity profile] pwopahnetazeta.livejournal.com 2013-10-17 04:19 pm (UTC)(link)
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS:OOOOOO
YEEEEY YEEEEEY YEEEEEY YEEEEEEEEEEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[identity profile] zetastation.livejournal.com 2013-10-14 02:47 am (UTC)(link)
Aww my gosh! When will Matt tell Dom he loves him?! :'(((

Oh geeeeeeeeez!!! I love this fic so much and, as you may have noticed, I read this all in one goal xD

PLEASE YOU CAN'T LEAVE IT JUST LIKE THIS PLEASE I NEED MORE I'M ADDICTED TO THIS MARVELLOUS FIC PLEASE UPDATE IT OMG I'M LOVING THIS SO MUUUUUUUCH!!!

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2013-10-17 03:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! I'll be posting an update for this in the next couple of days.

[identity profile] zetastation.livejournal.com 2013-10-17 03:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Yay!!! *---*

[identity profile] tamarelmensdorp.livejournal.com 2015-09-12 03:11 pm (UTC)(link)

Oh no, this is sad. The truth, for sure, but so sad :'(.

[identity profile] hannah-chapter.livejournal.com 2015-10-03 09:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I know, reality starting to kick in.